Fireside Chat

Before Christmas, I was walking through Sam's Club and encountered this scene on a very large TV screen.

You can now have a crackling fire in your home without having to chop any firewood. Even tho I didn't buy it, it's probably a great idea. Why stop there? Perhaps we could have a pet dog in our home without having to feed it or do any nasty cleanup. During the summer, a nice big rotating fan would give the appearance of cool air flow. Why not show a live webcam view of crashing ocean waves to give your home that beachfront feel (without tsunamis). "They" probably already sell all these ideas along with the giant aquarium scene. I once had two goldfish named Alfie & Omega. They both died when I placed their fish bowl too close to the crackling TV fireplace.

Polar Eyes

We don't see things as they are,
we see things as we are.
--Anais Nin (1903-1977) American/French writer

Roundabout

Do you ever feel like you're going in circles, and that you repeatedly continue going over the same ground, without making much headway? (If you drive NASCAR, that's definitely the case.) This sign in our neighborhood warns of a "roundabout" intersection, where nobody really knows who has the right-of-way. It's lucky we have this sign (from all four directions) so drivers don't go straight through and take out the flowers that have been planted in the middle.

Check Mate

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Check Mate
Date Written: September 4, 2009.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Kit, Line 2: Johnnny, and so on and so forth.}

Seven thousand crickets chirped like
Concert fans encore hopeful for
Another chance at the big knockout
Punch your neighbor and kiss your enemies
Until your dry lips whisper "Checkmate"
Take a break, sip some agua fria with Maria
Stoke a giant blaze in the chimenea
Fire is our friend into the dark in the park
Where fireflies light forbidden routes
Follow the fog through the torquoise night
To the place where the bees bring their treasure
Hivey hovey to the Hexagon Queen's court
Sipping our tea, you resemble the sea
Salt to a fault and sugar with honey
Brine of the Gods, our souls marinate
Seasoning spirits with herbs that stop by
Under the cover of a periwinkle sinking sky
Pack up your woolens and bring in the sheep
As the hills roll away and hunker back down
Let's hide in a log with a frog from uptown
You breathe in the smog, I'll deal with the crime
Bottom line is we deal the cards that play
The knight or the bishop...which should I take?
You took my rook - a regrettable mistake.

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Check Mate
Date Written: September 4, 2009.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Kit, Line 2: Johnnny, and so on and so forth.}

Cariflower

When you're walking around, with a Canon A540, looking for an interesting picture waiting to be taken, it's hard to pass up reflections.

If you were thinking

that these front yard flowers

are reflecting

in the passenger-side rear window

of a 1989 Honda Civic Hatchback

you would have been correct.

I could have just said

that the back of my car

was full of fresh flowers

but that would have been

misleading.

Legal Aliens

I recently had the pleasure of coming upon some aliens who had just landed.
Curiously, I did not feel any fear of abduction, just a calm sense of perhaps trying to have a dialogue with them, to gain some mutual understanding. They did agree to pose for a photo-op before we got started...

We agreed to take turns asking each other questions!

They first asked if they could speak to Our Leader, to which I said "Do you mean Hillary Clinton?", to which they retorted: "No, Tom Cruise!"

It was now my turn to ax, so I decided to throw them a two-part question: 1. "Why are you here?" and 2. "How long are you staying?"

Their answer was: "We are here to help Warm Your Planet", and "We are leaving because your Dear Leader has imposed a new UFO Tax, which is Driving us Out of Orbit!"

The Legal Aliens then surprised me with their next question: "Why didn't Adam Lambert win Season 8 of American Idol?" (Maybe you can help me out with a response here!)

My next two-parter: 1."What have you found to be the healthiest substance in the universe?" and, 2. "What do you use as your currency?"

Their answer to both parts: "Heineken."

Johnny Convention

Have you ever thought how much fun it would be to have a convention of people who all had your same name? You certainly would not have to wear any name tags. At a convention of Johnnys, you would find:

Johnny The Talk Show Host

Johnny The Environmentalist
Johnny The Musician

Johnny The Actor

Johnny The Adventurer (Johnny Quest)

Johnny The SuperHero

Fireworks

When it comes to Fourth of July fireworks, some of the best fireworks are growing in our backyards. Flowers are the original summer fireworks. Even tho this particular bloom isn't growing in our particular backyard, we will probably end up sitting on our elevated deck this Fourth of July evening and watching all the fireworks going off around us, just like we did last year. Happy 4th of July Independence Day!

Reflections

If you were going to start collecting something, what would it be? What's that one thing that might get you to scout out garage sales? I recently decided to act on a previous decision to start a collection of mirrors. Mirrors are very Zen. They reflect whatever is before them, without changing their nature. The first addition to My Mirror Collection is not the mirror pictured, but rather a different mirror, but a mirror nonetheless. It cost $5 but it's worth more than that to me. Every adventure begins with a first step.

Milky Way

Do you ever feel like your problems that you're dealing with are becoming rather large? It always helps to zoom out for a second to put everything in perspective.

If your life has what seems like some big problems, let's compare them to the size of our Galaxy. Our Solar System is located in our Galaxy which we call The Milky Way. This spiral galaxy is in the shape of a big disk which is around 100,000 light years in diameter and about 1,000 light years in thickness. One light year is approximately 5.8 trillion miles. Our Solar System is about 26,000 light years from the galactic center of the Milky Way, which is estimated to have about 200-400 billion stars, and thought to be about 13 billion years old. Size-wise, if the Milky Way was reduced to 100 meters across, our own Solar System would only be about 1 millimeter in width. The Milky Way is just one of billions of galaxies in the Universe. Now, maybe your current issues that you're dealing with, don't seem quite so big. The next time you think you have a big problem, keep it in perspective, relative to the big picture.

Room Snacks

While travelling, we often find ourselves in a hotel room with only a TV remote control and a coffee pot. Today's Travel Tip is to bring your own Room Snacks to make your home away from home more homey.

Here we see a nice variety representing most of the four major snack groups. Notice the clever use of the Aerobies as serving plates. I like to snack, but expecially if I'm at all nervous. Obviously, in this picture taken in Detroit Lakes, I was quite nervous.

Big Deal

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Subject: Fargo Flood 2009.
Title: Big Deal.
Date Written: March 30, 2009.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Kit, Line 2: Johnnny, and so on and so forth.}
{Rhyme scheme: ABAB, CDCD, and so on and so forth.}

Title: BIG DEAL.
When the rain falls hard on the grassy plains
Too much of a good thing can become a big deal
Like gray-haired rock singers' old refrains
If you don't plan your future, stand in line for a meal.
The message I sent in a bottle, now is lost in a sea
There's a river thru my kitchen and sandbags round my bed
How lost can I get before you find me
In a refugee camp with a bandana round my head.
Behind the walls that protect all we love
Mother Nature wreaks havoc to display her power
She teaches us things we have never thought of
Like mixing hot with cold, or sweet with sour.
Fighting like cougars, mostly we are kittens
Biting down trees, dam it up, says the beaver
Our grandmothers made us most of these mittens
While Granpa made moonshine to help with spring fever.
I've entered the tunnel, but see there's a light
Dark times behind us, ahead it's all bright.

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Subject: Fargo Flood 2009.
Title: Big Deal.
Date Written: March 30, 2009.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Kit, Line 2: Johnnny, and so on and so forth.}
{Rhyme scheme: ABAB, CDCD, and so on and so forth.}

Mark's Twain

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.
--Mark Twain

Simple Delight

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Simple Delight.
Date Written: February 10, 2007.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Kit, Line 2: Johnnny, and so on and so forth.}

Title: Simple Delight.

The cheese melted quickly, like
Warming glaciers wet in the sun
Blinding, I was a deer in the headlights
Can't see between the lines on your face
Like old lace, they embrace your fast pace
Hug my brain to shock some ideas out
From beneath the cobwebs' sticky grip
Kiss the spider woman as she spins me
I am a package in her cluttered warehouse
Box me up, don't bring us down around
Bonfires in backyards where leaves flutter
Picture yourself on a path leading to
Chinese wisdom and peacepipes shared
Amongst strangers in the night, no fright
Just a simple delight, like knowing you're right
No regrets in the end. Balance your life
On a solid gold scale, dipping and teetering
What's the point, if we can't have a little fun.

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Simple Delight.
Date Written: February 10, 2007
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Kit, Line 2: Johnnny, and so on and so forth.}

Budget Inn Express

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Budget Inn Express
Date Written: November, 2006.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Johnnny, Line 2: Kitz, and so on and so forth.}

I knew when we checked in
I'd be glad to check out again
Quite frankly, after a long drive
The car tried to steer away from that dive
After a couple beers or more
Our expectations flew right out the door
Expedia.com didn't show a picture of this place
So Johnnny felt like he had egg on his face
Wait for the pending busload of bums
To pick over the remaining slums
Room 149
It wasn't divine
Til Morgan showed up with his rums.

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Budget Inn Express
(Grand Forks, North Dakota)
Date Written: November, 2006.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Johnnny, Line 2: Kitz, and so on and so forth.}

Christmas Interruptis

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Christmas Interruptis.
Date Written: December 2, 2006.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Kit, Line 2: Johnnny, and so on and so forth.}

Title: Christmas Interruptis.

Wandering aimlessly, lost in a field
I couldn't remember if your letter was sealed
A wave of emotion surged through my torso
The King wanted less, but the Queen thought more-so
Mockingbirds sang to the light in the east
While turkeys were roasting, for the big feast
Abruptly aborted, the plan was not hatched
Christmas Interruptis, the ball was not catched
The Queen, in a rage, ate a platefull of cheese
While mice in the den put on the squeeze
Chaos did erupt, like volcanoes on crack
Yearning and burning, I'll give it a smack
Intensely deficient, we searched endlessly
Using some scotch and some gin, and mixing blendlessly
The edges came loose, the seams pulled away
My clothes don't fit me, too much sorbet
"Hey man, take a left, there's a cop on the right"
So, stay out of jail, and to all, a good night!

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Christmas Interruptis.
Date Written: December 2, 2006.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Kit, Line 2: Johnnny, and so on and so forth.}

Sum of the Parts

An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Sum of the Parts.
Date: February 12, 2009.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.
{Line 1: Kit, Line 2: Johnnny, and so on and so forth.}



Sum of the Parts.

I tied my shoes and set out on my way
On the surface, it seemed like any other day
Until I discovered the maze I was in
Bodies that once seemed fat, now a bit thin
Without a clock we waited for the sun
Everyone agrees that it's time for some fun
So let down your hair and shake it up
Share the same bed at night and in the morn the same cup
When two become one it's something real
Equations aren't always something you feel
How can you predict the sum of the parts
Perhaps you'd like to join the Queen for some tarts
Her minstels' notes floating through the air
It's all ferris wheel music at the County Fair.


An Add-On Poem by Kit & Johnnny.
Title: Sum of the Parts.
Date: February 12, 2009.
Copyright © 2009. All rights reserved.

Uncle Albert

Quotations from Person of the Century: Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler. I never think of the future. It comes soon enough. Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater. Not everything that counts can be counted, and not everything that can be counted counts. (Sign hanging in Einstein's office at Princeton). The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new. The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education. Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school. The most incomprehensible thing about the world is that it is comprehensible. If A is success in life, then A equals X plus Y plus Z. Work is X; Y is play; and Z is keeping your mouth shut. Sometimes one pays most for the things one gets for nothing. Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen. Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the the universe. In order to form an immaculate member of a flock of sheep one must, above all, be a sheep. Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding. We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them. I want to know God's thoughts; the rest are details. My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind. A person starts to live when he can live outside himself. A human being is a part of a whole, called by us "universe", a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings as something separated from the rest - a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest to us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty. The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources. The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.